The Other Woman

I was talking with a friend today about a situation she was in. A mutual friend of ours had been involved with another woman's man for quite some time now, and asked us for our advice. Her "love interest" has been in a relationship with his girlfriend for a little over two years now and has been physically and emotionally involved with her (who previously had a serious relationship with him in the past) for the past six months. As time passes by, her feelings for the guy continue to grow stronger and vice-versa. However, the guy isn't showing much interest in breaking up with his current girlfriend.

For this reason, my friend is debating whether she should break it off before it gets messy or should she wait around for him to break up with his girlfriend. She keeps reiterating that she has a strong emotional attachment to the guy and trusts that his love for her will make him leave his girlfriend. However, if this was the case, why hasn't he done it yet?

Because of his infidelity and her naivety, she has now become "The Other Woman".

Usually when someone asks me advice on a situation, I try my best to use less judgement and use a more constructive, assertive approach. But there are a few thoughts about her situation that crosses my mind:

1. If she were to stay involved with the guy, the situation will eventually get messy. What if they get caught? What if he never breaks up with his girlfriend and ends up stringing her along? What if he is just using her for physical activity? She would never have all of him because a piece of him would always be with his girlfriend. (She is obviously important to him if they've been together for two years)
2. If she were to stop all interaction with the guy, why now? If they have been involved for over six months, what difference would it make whether they stopped in the beginning, now, or later? Whats done is done! She has already disrespected him and his girl's relationship, and is just as responsible as he is. How would it affect her emotionally if they were to call a quits?
3. How would she feel if she was in his girlfriend's position? Suppose he DOES break up with his girlfriend to be with her, how would it affect their relationship? Would she be able to trust him? Would she resent him for how they "got back together"?

I know how much my friend LOVES this guy, so I couldn't really tell my friend what I thought she should do about the situation, even though I knew it was something she needed to hear.

What would you do if someone told you to let go of the person you love MOST in the world because the timing wasn't right?

Do situations like these ever end happily, or does she have false hope?

Thoughts????

The Alum-life!

On Saturday, Aug. 15, 2009 at 1p.m. I took my stroll across the stage at The University of North Texas to proudly receive my Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism. It had to be one of the happiest moments of my life. and a great accomplishment for me. After countless all-nighters, term papers, published articles, weekly NABJ meetings, three internships, and a little bit of partying when I should have been studying lol, I was finally at the end of my undergraduate journey.

It is a bitter sweet experience.

Sweet because I am finally giving my brain a break from school, but bitter because I feel stagnant. With the way the economy has been going, I am beginning to get a little discouraged about finding a job. I have been looking for a while now, and haven't made much progress....

During my down time, I find myself bored. Since grade school, I have been used to having a busy schedule. Whether it was extra-curricular activities, church, school, or just my daily hobbies or play time, I have always had something to do. Although it has only been one week since Ive been an Alumna, I've had to find things to do to keep myself busy. (Besides looking for a job) Currently, my daily routine consists of waking up, eating breakfast, and logging onto the computer to job search and/or follow-up on job opportunities. After that, I usually catch up with my friends or meet up for Happy Hour. By the time we are done passing the time talking and laughing, it is time to go home and start the day over....

It is now week two, and I will be starting my laundry list of things to do during my leisure time:

1. Look for a job, of course......had to put this as number one!


2. Beginning my new work out routine (I think Ive gained a few pounds after eating all of the broccoli, rice, cheese casserole Shannon's mom made me...yum! lol)


3. Getting things ready for our first book club meeting.


4. Weekly volunteer work at local non-profit organization.


5. Spend more time with my nephew (because he is the only child I will gladly take ANYWHERE with me, lol)

Until I find a job, these weekly (some daily) activities are sure to keep me busy during my leisure time. I welcome any other suggestions you may have.

Until next time, write you later!